You've probably all seen the Amigo commercial. 1970's hippies singing the "Slinky" song to advertise a puny 4x4. Here's the music for the Hummer version:

(sung to the "Slinky" song)

What goes down stairs and draws lots of stares and makes a diesel-like sound?
A beast! A beast! A wonderful beast! Everyone knows its Hummer,
A Hummer, a Hummer, for war it's a wonderful ploy!
A Hummer, a Hummer, it's fun for a girl or a boy!

What doesn't come cheap and runs over Jeeps and makes other drivers cringe?
A tank! A tank! A plush-cabin tank! Everyone knows its Hummer,
A Hummer, a Hummer, it's definitely fun to do!
A Hummer, a Hummer, if Arnold owns one why can't you?

Jeff B. <jb@route6x6.com>

During the first month of waiting my true love gave to me:

• A winch with a roller fair lead,
• During the second month of waiting my true love gave to me:
• Dual oil filters and a winch with a roller fair lead,
• During the third month of waiting my true love gave to me:
• Three air horns, dual oil filters, and a winch with a roller fair lead,
• ....four polished wheels
• ....five Hella lights
• ....six year extended warrantee
• ....seven swamps in Florida
• ....eight stinger missels
• ....nine gawkers gawking
• ....ten cans of spray paint
• ....eleven hummer T-shirts
• ....twelve CD changer

Debbie Markley

This is a story 'bout a hummer named red,
Awesome mountianere always kept a shotgun in the bed,
Then one day he was a muddin',
Ran over a jeep squished it like puddin',
Out from the jeep came a ragin' man,
Made a fist with his han',
Then red ran him over too.

Josh Moody

Anonymous